Immersion Worship

One thing I’ve learned over the past couple of days is that God is an encourager. My prayer since Monday has basically been a prayer of submission. I’ve been telling God that I trust Him to deal with all the stuff that’s going on around me, because I can’t; I don’t know how to. Sure, I’ll do what I know to do and be sensible about working out insurance and finances and all that, but I don’t want the wheel; I want God to know that I know He is in complete control.

And so while there is still so much uncertainty that we face over the coming weeks, God encouraged me today. My wife went out to a baby shower, and when she left I decided to pray for her (since it was the first time she has driven since her accident) and just pray again over these situations. While I was praying, God reminded me of a passage in Psalm 119, and that passage became my prayer…

Look upon my suffering and deliver me, for I have not forgotten Your law. Defend my cause and redeem me; preserve my life according to Your promise. Salvation is far from the wicked, for they do not seek out Your decrees. Your compassion is great, O Lord; preserve me life according to Your laws. Many are the foes who persecute me, but I have no turned from Your statutes. I look on the faithless with loathing, for they do not obey Your word. See how I love Your precepts; preserve my life, O Lord, according to Your love. All Your words are true; all Your righteous laws are eternal.”- Psalm 119:153 - 160.

…and as I read this verse, God said one simple thing to me that just lifted me right out of my pity party for one and into a feeling of celebration and anticipation for an incredible future. He said “My promises to you are still true.”

I find it amazing that the promises God spoke over me thousands of years ago still remain true. The Psalmist was crying out in this psalm for God to preserve him according to His promise, law, and love, and that promise stands for all of us. That promise is still true.

Thank you so much to all of you who are praying. It’s incredible to see a community acting like a community, and my wife and I sincerely appreciate all your words of encouragement and prayers. Just to add to the list of thing to be praying for, I found out yesterday that my job is no longer secure, so I’m praying for guidance and clarity as to what I should do, where I should go, and when I should make the move.

We’re still pressing on and hanging tough. God is good. I can’t wait to see what He’s got in store for us.

In Rob Bell’s first NOOMA video, he talks about rain. More specifically, he talks about the storms in life. If you’ve got ten minutes, watch this before I tell you about the storms in my life right now…



The last couple of months have gone from a light drizzle to a raging storm. In the space of seven short weeks, my wife has had a car accident, my mum has died, my job is under threat of redundancy, my wife had another accident and has smashed up her hand so bad she might need surgery, and now last night my dad had a stroke. It becomes clear, at least to my wife and I, that we’re in one of life’s storms right now. The financial implications could be huge. The health implication even bigger.

This is, without a doubt, the biggest test of my faith that I’ve ever faced. There’s a part of me that wants to get a bit angry and wants to try and take control. But I know in my heart that if I do, life will spin out of control even faster.

As I was watching Rob Bell’s video, I remembered my mum’s favourite Psalm…

“I look up to the mountains; does my strength come from mountains? No, my strength comes from God,who made heaven, and earth, and mountains. He won’t let you stumble,your Guardian God won’t fall asleep. Not on your life! Israel’s Guardian will never doze or sleep. God’s your Guardian,right at your side to protect you, shielding you from sunstroke,sheltering you from moonstroke. God guards you from every evil,he guards your very life. He guards you when you leave and when you return,he guards you now, he guards you always.”

I can’t see more than 3 feet in front of my nose when it comes to life, an I’m learning to trust God to get me through the storm. And even as I write this, I know God’s holding me and my wife tight and whispering “We’re gonna make it…I love you…”.

We’re in for some crazy ride here and I’m so thankful that I’m not the one who’s in control.

I’ve been quiet for the last couple of days with good reason.

Someone once told me that we find out who we really are when life throws us a curve ball. I’m beginning to discover the truth in that statement.

At 11:45pm GMT on Tuesday April 20th, my mum went to be with Jesus, thereby ending her 8 year journey with Alzheimer’s disease, becoming free from the torture and torment of infirmity, finally embraced by freedom in the hands of her Saviour.

I count myself somewhat blessed that I didn’t witness her decline from lucidity to senility. Being half way around the world removed me from that. I last saw her on April 12th of this year, and the time before that was August 2001. A lot happens in 7 years when you have Alzheimer’s.

And so when I saw her in April, it was, for me, a time to say goodbye. And I did. But when God finally called her home, I didn’t imagine it would feel like this.

And so as I sit here at the airport in Los Angeles, awaiting a last-minute flight to London, I’m learning a lot about myself. I’m learning that our parents must be cherished, since their life led to ours. I’m learning I’m sometimes too callous about the things I’m emotionally tied to. And I’m learning to see that God has a good, great, perfect purpose in every single painful situation that exists. He never wastes a hurt.

Tomorrow I will land in London and drive to Oxford and hang with my sisters. Sometime soon we will bury or cremate my mother. And this week I will take the opportunity to grieve with my family. I’m learning that my family are just unspeakably important to me. I’m learning that we shouldn’t hold on to past hurts and offenses.

If you’re reading this, stop reading and call your parents and tell them you love them. Trust me, you can never say it enough, because when they are gone, you wish you’d said it more.

As for my mum, she’s whole again, smiling and joyful in a perfect eternity. I like to think that by now she will have met my still-born twin sister, been reunited with her parents, and finally gotten to meet Noah and his family. My sisters tell me that just moments before she passed, she shed one final tear, probably her sadness at saying goodbye to us for now. Now there are no more tears. There’s no more confusion. There’s no more frustration. There’s no more sickness.

That means that it’s time to rejoice.

Catch you all on the east side.

At last night’s Summit Leadership meeting, Scott took us through an exercise as we continue to shape the team and the church. He handed us three blank cards, a sharpie, some sticky stars. The objective was to write down the three values that we value the most in a church, then post them on the wall for everyone to see, and then with our sticky stars mark the values that other people had written down that, aside from our own, we valued the most. It was a really interesting exercise; seeing how each servant leadership capacity puts a bias on our valued values. For example, our media leader valued creativity a lot, while our hospitality leader valued reaching out. The good news is that there were common themes that everyone agreed on; putting God first, unity, love, servanthood, honesty etc.

My three values were:

1. Authentic worship
2. Relevance
3. Integrity/Purity

Ever tried anything like that at your church? How did it go? If you haven’t, what would be your top three valued values and why?

As I was doing some reading this morning, I was struck by a particular paragraph that was quite eye opening…

“Although we may reach a point where, through our personal relationship with God, we can steadily maintain balance, we’ll never be able to reach a permanent place of balance. God doesn’t want us to. He wants us to struggle, because it’s within the struggle that we learn dependence on Him.”

Smack me upside the head.

I remember when I first moved to the States. I had such a grand plan for myself that involved a great job, a visa sponsorship, a good salary, etc. It quickly became evident that none of that was going to work out. The short of it is that I was forced in to a place where I absolutely had to depend on God. When I finally got comfortable with depending on God, things began falling in to place that, while were completely different to the plan I had for myself, were nonetheless great things.

Time went on, Rhonda and I got married, I got my Green Card, I got a good job with a good salary etc., and without knowing it, I lost my dependence on God again.

So reading that paragraph this morning has really hit home. I’m not in control of my life. I don’t even want to be in control of my life because I know that I tend to mess things up while God always cleans things up. So if God wants me to struggle again to learn to depend on Him, that’s alright.

It reminds me of a song by All Star United that has the line “and now she feels she’s gained the wheel, but never control.” Isn’t that just how life is with us sometimes? We convince ourselves that we’ve got the wheel, that we’re in charge of the direction and speed in which we’re headed, but the truth is that we never have control.

I can’t think of any quicker way to make my life spin out of control than to take the wheel from God.

Dependence on Him? Yes please.

Has it been a week since my last post?

Holy cow.

Well I hope everyone had a fantastic Easter. I’ll get a worship confessional up in a little while as well as a few other things that are on my mind.

In the meantime, I started reading a fantastic book this morning. I’m only in to the second chapter, but it’s really engaging and deals with something that is universally a challenge for every believer; how to be in the world but not of the world. It’s called ‘The Journey Towards Relevance’ by Kary Oberbrunner. Read it. It’s good.

A few weeks ago, Matt and Sarah Keller were with us from Next Level Church. In our service, Matt shared an encouraging word about being a ‘David’ in the face of the giants we will face as a young church that is growing; seeing God as the ‘God of the underdogs’. Later that evening Matt and Sarah shared at a leadership meeting as we started to strategize and prepare for continued growth at The Summit.

Some of what Matt & Sarah shared really opened my eyes to some of the challenges and opportunities that we are faced with at The Summit. Some of them are challenges that face us today, and others are challenges that we’ll face in the future, but regardless of the timing of them, it’s become glaringly apparent that we, as a team and as individuals, need to prepare for those changes now.

What does this mean? We have to recognize that what we’ve done so far has been great for a new church and great for a church of 100 or so people. We established some great momentum and have developed the beginnings of a healthy worship culture. However, it can’t stop there. It mustn’t stop there. What can be regarded as excellent for a church of 100 people becomes mediocre for a church of 250. What is excellent for a church of 250 becomes mediocre for a church of 500. What is excellent for a church of 500…you see where this is going. I’m also not simply referring to musical, creative excellence, but excellence in our hearts also.

Now over the last couple of weeks God has really challenged me on the questions of what am I doing to ensure the continued success of the ministry as the church grows, and I’m 100% certain these questions aren’t just for me. What are we doing? Where are we going? How do we plan on getting there? Perhaps most importantly, the one question that God put on my heart that I simply CAN NOT get away from is “would you want to be led by you?” Yeah. Heavy stuff.

So I started thinking about some of these things and trying to figure out how to shape some answers in to a vision that my team and my church can grasp…

What are we doing? What are we doing? It seems almost as if we have become collectively complacent about what our ministry is really about. We show up on Sunday mornings and go in to auto-pilot mode; unload the truck, set up the stage and audio, soundcheck and rehearse, eat a donut and drink coffee, pray, then play. Where in that sequence are we leaving room for what really matters? Where is there room for us to step away from the worship ministry, step away from each other, and go and find that visitor who is with us for the first time, or the returning guest who looks familiar but we’ve never talked to?

A couple of weeks ago an atheist woman came to The Summit because she received one of our mailers with her dead husband’s name on it. I’m ashamed that I didn’t spot her in the crowd, before or after service, and be the one who went and offered a hand of friendship and told her that I was glad she was there. I was too busy or too ignorant or simply wanted to chat with the people I already know. Not every one is called as an evangelist, be we are all called to evangelize. If offering a real, tangible, authentic extension of God’s love isn’t the single, pivotal focus of The Summit’s worship ministry and everyone involved in it, then we miss the mark, not only of what God’s idea of worship is, but also what God’s purpose is in our lives.

Where are we going? I don’t think it’s any secret that the vision Scott & Mary Turner have for The Summit is big. This is God’s church and He will grow it, not us. There is not one single thing that any man can do to make the church grow. But there is everything man can do to stop a church from growing. So the answer to where we are going is simple: Wherever God leads us. While that answer is simple, being ready to go wherever God leads us is not. It means being more prepared than ever. It means striving for the excellence of a church of 250 when we’re a church of 100. When we get to 250, it means striving for the excellence of a church of 500. It means setting and maintaining ministry standards and holding each other accountable to them. It means we never stop, never coast, never get in to cruise control, but continue to work harder and work smarter so that when God says ‘go!’, we are ready and prepared. When God first called David to be a king and a warrior, David was completely unprepared and unskilled to do so, but through perseverant determination and hard work and heart that jealously sought after God, he developed the skill and the strength and the desire and the mindset to do whatever God asked of him. That’s where we need to be. That’s who we need to be.

How do we plan on getting there? By changing. By taking a long hard look at who we are and what we are, collectively and individually, and affecting change in the areas that need change. It’s not easy to accept our own weaknesses. By the very nature of our humanity, we naturally want to recognize and play off our strengths and ignore our weaknesses. By doing that, we handicap ourselves. We leave no room for God to fill the void. This means asking ourselves some tough questions – what am I not good at? Think about this. This isn’t just a practical exercise, it’s a spiritual exercise. We have to find our Achilles heel, our weaknesses, and then we need to work at turning them in to strengths, through prayer as well as hard work. On the practical side, how often are we practicing our instruments at home? What are we doing to stretch and develop our skill and continue learning? Vocalists, what are we doing to bring further consistency and strength and projection to our voices? How are we working to increase our musical range and increase our depth of expression? On the spiritual side, how much time are we devoting to really preparing ourselves for leading His church in to His presence? Where are we placing prayer on the scale of important things we must do every day? What about fasting? What about spending time in His word? Are we really making ourselves available to hear from Him and to spend time in His presence, individually and as a team? Tough, tough questions.

Here’s the toughest: Would you want to be led by you? My answer right now, knowing what I know about me…no, I would not want to be led by me. Ask the question of yourself and investigate your answer. It might surprise you. Whether we like it or not, being up on the stage in the most visible ministry in the church, and being tasked with leading the body of Christ in to God’s presence, comes with more scrutiny than I think anyone is comfortable with. Whether we like it or not, we are viewed as leaders in the church. When we fall or when we step out of place, it becomes a little more apparent than, say, the guy who stacks the chairs. This has incredible impact on the way we behave, both in church and out of church. Why wouldn’t I want to be led by me? Because I know what I think. I know what I say and do when I think nobody can see me. I know that there are parts of my character that aren’t in line with God’s Word. And that’s what character is all about – who you are when no-one is looking. For me, this means that I must seek after…strive after…change in my life. It means really….REALLY…trying to become more like Christ. It means being a better husband. It means being more organized. It means taking things seriously that I haven’t taken seriously before. It means watching what I say. It means being patient and kind and less selfish. It means guarding my eyes, ears, and heart from things I might see or hear that are dishonouring to God. It means making decisions founded in God’s Word rather than my own impulses and feelings. It means seeking after a purity in my heart and my hands that reflect His will instead of my sinful nature. These things then lend credence to my position as a leader in the church and cause me to be a more effective, more willing, more loving servant. I encourage you to ask yourself this question and challenge yourself to become the leader that you would want to be led by.

This is heavy I know. And for my team, I hope you are not discouraged by any of this. In fact, I hope that you are encouraged, because above all else, we must remember that there are three things that we can be absolutely, 100% sure of.

First, YOU are anointed by God as a worship leader. Whether you lead a song or not is irrelevant. If you are on this team, you are a worship leader. God has anointed you to be that.

Second, YOU are appointed as a worship leader to The Summit Church. This is where God wants you. God puts us in situations and in places to grow us and shape us. That’s what being a disciple means. The challenges we face are opportunities for us to grow and learn; let’s see them as positive experiences.

Finally, and perhaps most importantly, it is in our weaknesses that God’s power is made perfect. He is the source of our strength. He is the source of our guidance. There is absolutely nothing that we can’t achieve if we put our trust in Him.

I am blessed to have such an awesome team of awesome individuals; I’m proud of all of them and all that we have achieved together so far, and I am excited for the journey that we will continue on together.

A few days ago I read this post over at Mandy’s blog, and have been intrigued by her question…

How human should those in ministry be?

It’s an interesting question, because I think the answer is subjective to church culture and will change from church to church, but I’m going to answer it from my point of view; the point of view of the worship ministry at The Summit.

Let’s take a look at the facts. We are human. We sin. There’s no getting away from that. Furthermore, it is us that puts our sin on a scale of ‘not-so-bad’ to ‘terrible’, not God. God treats our sins equally, but we say things like “it’s just a white lie, it doesn’t hurt anyone” and “sexual sins are worse than all other sins”, when personally I don’t see that reflecting what Jesus taught on how the Father deals with our sin.

So, with that said, how human can we be in our very visible ministry that, by it’s very nature, is under higher scrutiny and higher standards than perhaps most other ministries? My answer: as human as our humanity dictates. That’s not saying that there isn’t a time and place for people to take time off when circumstances require, but isn’t the whole point of ‘leading by example’ all about working out our faith against our struggles of the flesh? How relatable is a flawless robot to a congregation, versus someone who is simply authentic about who they are and don’t hide their humanity from the world?

Of course, one big question that I bet gets asked in every church, even if it’s a silent question that’s never addressed publicly, is “what about when sin is present?” Well, ignoring my statement above regarding the way we deal with sin versus the way that God deals with sin, I ask three simple questions:

1. If the sin was habitual, has it stopped?
2. Is the person repentant before God and before those affected?
3. Is the person taking steps to address any offense caused or taken?

If the answer to those three questions is ‘yes’, then the person serves. Yes, flexibility and understanding are required on the part of all parties, but the widespread sensitivity that exists when someone who has done nothing more than fallen back in to their own humanity is, in my opinion, unbiblical and uncalled for.

Also to bear in mind is that there are people out there, especially with the artistic and creative personality, that need to be serving in order to stay connected with their church and continue to grow. Alienation is hurtful and harmful; why would we want to go there?

Ultimately what it comes down to is that without authenticity, without a level of transparency that is indicative of our vulnerability and humanity, then we’re no better than the hypocrites Jesus bashed. Our responsibility lies in what the Bible tells us; guard our hearts, hide His word there so that we mightnot sin, love Him, love others. We can’t be perfect, and that’s what we need to recognize.

I was in Seattle earlier this week on business. I enjoy traveling, not just because I get to see new places and meet all kinds of people, but also because I’m a people watcher. That’s right. I’m the guy in the airport who sits at the table and watches you. It’s not voyeuristic or nosy; I’m just curious about people; what walk of life they are from, where they’ve been, where they’re going to etc. People are quirky, as a general rule, and I can waste hours just watching the quirks.

So I was at the airport in Seattle with a couple of hours to kill before my flight. I sat myself down in the Alaskan Brewing Company Bar & Grill and ordered some buffalo wings and an Alaskan Pale Ale (best beer in the world, I swear. If you’re a beer drinker, get down to Bevmo and pick some up). As I was enduring my buffalo wings (and I mean enduring - more about that later) and enjoying the Alaskan nectar, I saw a middle aged man walk in with a man I presume was his father. I presume this on account of the fact that the middle aged man kept calling his traveling companion “dad”.

They took a seat by the window, and I noticed that “dad” clearly suffered from some kind of motor disease - Parkinson’s perhaps - as he shook a lot and didn’t appear to have much control over it. The son helped him to his chair and took his walking cane away and they ordered some food and a glass of wine each.

When the food came, I watched the old man struggle. He couldn’t lift the fork. He was dropping his food. It was an enormous struggle for him to take a sip of his wine. I felt incredibly sorry for him and wondered how on earth he gets through life without ever having a moment of control. Then something happened that was just awesome. The son moved next to him, and began to help him out. He fed him and held the glass of wine to his lips. He made sure he had a napkin when he needed one, and together they finished their meal. When they were done, he helped the man up and gave him his cane, then with their arms locked together, he led him out of the restaurant and towards the gate.

Now, I’m not one to typically draw deep, spiritual parallels between my random and probably somewhat creepy people watching and my relationship with God, but as I saw this incredible act of the son looking after his close relative, God spoke to me and said “this is what my son does for you.”

You see, in my natural state, I am diseased. My soul is full of the sin and crud of my past, filthy with my fallen, human inadequacy and idiosyncrasy. On my own, I can not live. I’m unable to feed myself. I’m unable to quench my thirst. On my own, I don’t really have control over my life, even if I think do. This is true for all of humanity. There isn’t one person who has lived, is living, or will live who can fill these voids on their own.

But I am alive eternally because the Son stepped in to my life, and began to feed me and look after me. When I need to go somewhere, He leads me. When I need to stop, He helps me rest. There isn’t one moment in life that He isn’t right there beside me, His arm in mine, helping me along in this crazy world.

This was just one of those moments when I gained just a little more understanding of how God loves me. And it made the awful buffalo wings worth it.

Jeff over at Consuming Worship has posted the second part of my interview. You can check it out here.